PRINCE CHIDI PHILLIP
Since my ordination, a lot has happened — beautiful moments and surprisingly, a good number of secret DMs asking the same question: “Do priests have sex?”
Some come with “true stories.” Others claim to have dated priests. Honestly? That’s not even my worry.
What really troubles me is how sex has become the center of existence for many people — especially among us Africans. One Facebook post struck me. One gentleman said his wife suggested their son could become a priest. Sounds noble, right? But then he added, “If my son becomes a priest, I’ll secretly get a wife for him. I can’t let him live without knacking. After all, many priests do it.”
Wait… what? So the biggest dream you have for your son is sex?
This isn’t even about priesthood anymore. It’s about how we’ve centralized sex so much in our culture that it has blinded us from deeper things — purpose, discipline, contribution to society.
In Nigeria, many youths are either talking about sex, thinking about it, chasing it, or assuming it’s what defines a fulfilled life.
I’ve done a good number of marriage counselling sessions here in Korea. And you know what many couples complain about?
“We don’t even have time for intimacy.”
Why? Because they’re busy — with work, building careers, raising children, developing themselves. That’s why Korea is growing fast. Their minds are on development, not just on bodies.
Here’s the truth about priesthood:
We’re trained over the years — not just spiritually, but psychologically and emotionally — to manage sexual urges.
If you don’t do an act (like sex) for years, you learn to live without it. If your daily life is full — prayer, service, mission, study, people — sex naturally becomes the least of your worries.
So when people obsessively ask, “Do priests have sex?” I can’t help but think:
This is not really about priests.
It’s about you.
An idle mind. A misaligned priority.
A desire to justify undisciplined behavior by pointing fingers.
Only immature minds center their lives around sex. And when they can’t tame their desires, they find someone else to blame — priests are just an easy target.
Now don’t get me wrong — yes, there are priests who fall short of their vows.
Some made honest mistakes. Some got caught in old habits. Others may have never really embraced the calling deeply.
But here’s the real question:
Should we judge an entire priesthood by the failure of a few?
You know one priest who had sex?
Fine.
But does that automatically mean all priests are doing it too?
That’s like saying because one doctor committed malpractice, all doctors are killers. Or because one married man cheated, all husbands are useless.
Let’s be honest — it’s easy to focus on the scandal, the gossip, the juicy drama.
But have you ever stopped to look at the thousands of silent, faithful, prayerful, hardworking priests out there?
The ones waking up at 5AM for Mass, spending hours counseling people, visiting the sick, burying the dead, guiding youth, and standing in for broken families?
Nobody talks about them. Why?
Because faithfulness is not trending, and discipline doesn’t sell headlines.
But the truth remains: one bad egg doesn’t cancel the whole tray.
If you threw away your whole pot of rice because of one tiny stone, who’s the fool?
So yes — there are priests who break their vow of chastity.
But for every one who does, there are hundreds who stay true, fighting daily battles most people can’t even imagine.
And to reduce the whole identity of the priesthood to sex? That’s not just unfair — it’s immature.
So next time you’re tempted to throw shade, pause.
Check your facts. Check your heart.
And maybe… just maybe… check your own vows too.
©Prince Chidi Phillip